So life is really what we make of it. Sometimes it feels like we are dealt an unfair hand but it's all about what you do with what you are given that really counts. We can focus on our frustrations or we can figure out how to best get past them and move forward. A wise woman once told me that if we are focused on the past that we can't enjoy the good things in our future. If you don't like what your life looks like right now then don't wait another day to make some changes.
I am so thankful for the marriage I have to my amazing husband Mike. I am a truly blesses woman and I don't take this for granted. Marriage is something that requires time, energy, sacrifice, selflessness and sometime money. ( I seem to break electronics. I just dropped and dented our ipod touch the other day and have permanently damaged our laptop beyond repair. My husband loves me regardless thank GOD!).
If your marriage is not what you want it to be then don't give up! Go get marriage counceling. If you think your marriage is over, I am betting you it's not. You may have just given up. I believe that although an outsiders perspective is usually annoying and unwelcome it can also be eye opening and life changing. I have been reading an amazing book that has made me stop and think more about how I relate to the love of my life. It's called "The 5 Love Languages" written by Gary Chapman. This book was given to me by a friend months ago to read and I have just finally gotten though most of it so stay tuned for my final conclusion. This book is revolutionary to the way America, Hollywood, everyone I know pretty much, thinks of love. We all focus on "being in love" and when people fall out of love with their spouse they want out of the relationship. "The 5 Love Languages" explains that there are stages of love and that after you date and are in marriage things change and you need to work at love a little (or a lot). Sometimes things change in this way even during dating, but I want to focus on the marriage aspect of this. We all have "LOVE TANKS". Yes, odd term but bear with me. We have specific ways that we feel most loved. These are five basic love languages. Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, and Physical Touch. Most of us all express love though each of these and receive each of these as well but we have a primary one. Mine is quality time. I don't really care if you buy me presents but sometime I like it. I appreciate people doing things for me when I need a hand but it doesn't define me. You can tell me I am awesome if you want but I know if I really am or not and I know when you are just brown nosing. A hug totally shows love to me but I don't want just anyone touching me. If you really want to show me you care then you are going to spend the day doing things with me. Going for a stroll, eating a meal with me, painting or maybe just lounging. If my husband were to stop spending quality time with me then I would definitely feel unloved. It's something that I crave and need in my life to thrive. If your spouse deprives you of what makes you feel most loved then it doesn't seem to matter if they do everything else well. It's important to understand you spouses love language because you don't want their love tank to go to E!
NOT MARRIED? Get ready to be the most amazing spouse by getting a head start and reading "The 5 Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. You won't regret it I guarantee. It will prepare you with the real life stories and excite you to love better.
PRACTICE NOW! Start practicing on people you already love! Is your mom's love language acts of service? Make dinner for her! Clean the house or do all the vacuuming. Is your best friend in need of some gift giving loving? Time to go shopping or make him./her something to show them you care!
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